How to get rejected

I'm not going to claim this list is original as it is compiled from two other sources however I hope you find it useful.

(Remember, these are things you should do to get rejected.)

• Sloppy/messy envelopes
• No return postage or SAE
• Arrogant letter
• Testimonials from family and friends
• Sob stories
• Little gifts, irrelevant photos and other nonsense
• Wrong genre for agent/publisher
• Unreadable (badly printed, weird format, hand written)
• Not in requested submission format
• No synopsis
• Huge synopsis (should be 1-2 pages)
• Illiterate
• Eccentric (e.g. capitalises third letter of every word)
• Nothing to say
• Boring style
• Only of interest to author and his mother
• Already been written

And if you are rejected?

If, despite all your efforts, you're still rejected you mustn't take it personally because it isn't; agents and publishers deal with hundreds of submissions, it can't be personal for them.

If you get a rejection that says the publisher/agent did actually like it and gives reasons why they couldn't accept it. Then accept those reasons, they will be genuine, they have gone to the trouble of a personal reply and have no reason to lie.

You are entitled to feel disappointed, but only for a maximum of one hour. Then just pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start all over again.

It all comes down to professionalism. If you want to be regarded as a professional writer then you have to be one.

Steve Turnbull